I have enjoyed my time off since the completion of the new book. Taming the Terrible Twos: A Parents' Survival Guide was an adventure which revealed how much two-year-olds mirror, when it does not completely foretell the behavior of, teenagers.

T3, the affectionate name of the book, also took on the task of explaining some of the behaviors of older children and some colleagues. It offers tips and tricks for nutrition for picky eaters, enhancing speech, the benefits of schedules and routines, teaching responsibility, teaching second languages, the ever present need for discipline and the building of character.

The guest articles from Barbara Whitlock and editor John McDevitt gave the book interesting counterpoints. It was fun to find the wisdom of other parents who noticed the parallel between twos and teens.

The final chapter was named Parents' Successful Survival. Along with Barbara (mother of five), John (father of two and grandfather), Tina Hartley (mother of three and grandmother) and Melanie Denyer (mother of one) revealed four totally different images of how the terrible twos affect the lives of parents, siblings, grandparents and children.

Use the coupon "Facebook" to save on your copy of Taming the Terrible Twos.
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No Disrespect from Children

Did you raise a smart aleck? It is not necessarily a bad thing. When your child is not just sarcastic, but disrespectful, there is a problem.

Children talk back to adults, especially parents, disrespectfully when they feel authority is unjust, unreasonable or unfeeling. This ten step strategy for dealing with children's disrespectful back talk works like a charm.

1. Respect.

~Earn it, and then demand it from your children once you have it. Respect their right to an opinion by listening to what they have to say. Make it obvious that the reciprocal is expected.

2. Educate.

~Let your children know that there is a respectful way to voice opinion and dissent. Show them how to employ it by example. Rather than saying, "Your suggestion is stupid," try saying, "I think we need to reassess what you suggested because some of the foundation information is incorrect."

3. Enlighten.

~Show them how they react to being disrespectfully spoken to by speaking in like fashion. Show them how negativity cannot bring about a positive result. A video of their negative reaction is a better tool than parental acting skills, and far more persuasive

4. Discover.

~The source from which their disrespect springs. Is it an outside influence or you? Disrespect is most often a reaction to another's action, and negativity is contagious. Be objective in your own self-reflection because you may not see how your actions could cause disrespect. Repeat what you have said before a mirror for a good idea of how it sounded to them.

5. Restrict.

~Access to others who are disrespectful is counterproductive to having respectful children. Restrict that access. Negativity is contagious. Children and adults who are disrespectful to everyone as a reaction to being hurt by one person are not respectful influences on your children.

6. Question.

~Why has your child chosen that manner to speak to you? You have already self-reflected and looked at other sources. Go to the horse's mouth. Ask you child, point blank.

7. Listen.

~Your child will answer this question. Listen very carefully. Maintain eye contact. Sit in a receptive posture. Actively listen. Respond appropriately to what is said. Before you defend your position, be sure it is defensible.

8. Reverse.

~What will it take for your child to be more respectful? Ask your child. By respecting the fact that your child feels slighted, you show your willingness to help rectify the situation.

9. Help.

~Take your child's suggestions and incorporate them into your parenting style. This is the ultimate act of mutual respect. Provided your child provides a viable reason for being disrespectful, you can implement tactics like waiting two minutes before you respond to give him a chance to amend what he has said or making appointments to talk about matters once tempers have cooled.

10. Enjoy.

~Your respectful children will bring you joy. You have cultivated a mature and respectful relationship with your children. Most importantly, you have taught them how to build respectful relationships with others.

Caution: If you have not taken steps 1-3, you will definitely have to take 4-10. The first three tips will help you never have to determine a punishment for disrespectful children. They will not talk back to you or any other authority figure disrespectfully.

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No time to clean house?

With more children than the old lady in the shoe, I can guarantee I don't have a ton of time to clean...and then again, the only thing domestic about me was I was born in this country. If cleaning is just not your bag or does not fit in your schedule, take these time-saving tips.

Busy moms do not have time to spend two or three hours a day cleaning. Pick up a few of these quick cleaning tips to make cleaning a breeze for busy families. Singles can learn these cleaning tricks before they pick up "dirty" habits!

Organize:

Have a cleaning station where all household cleaning items are kept. This can be under a sink (for those with older or no children), top shelf in the laundry (for the toddler stage) or in a carry-all in a closet (great teen-aged access).

If you have cleaning items you only use in one room, keep them organized together. Consider a carry-all or basket under the sink for bathroom-only cleaning supplies like toilet tabs and pads.

Schedule:

Clean bathrooms and bedrooms on Tuesdays & Fridays; Common areas Monday, Wednesday & Saturday; Laundry room & appliances on Sunday afternoon.

Make the carpet an everyday affair. Before you go to bed, all items need to be off the carpet. Share this duty. Children should pick up their own messes.

Cannot do it all? Break it into smaller parts. Stick to your schedule, and you don't get behind!

Make a chore chart. It helps keep track of progress and aids in delegating tasks to other family members.

Down Time:

While a machine does a task, do something else. Do you have five minutes? Clean the tub. Waiting for the dryer? Dust the living room. Dishes drying? Collect the garbage from around the house.

Everyday:

Simple tasks like making the bed go a long way to keeping your house clean. Clean as you go when you are cooking. If you take out a project, put it away as soon as you are finished. Adopt the rule that you are not finished until the mess is clean.

Mail:

It comes six days a week. Read it over the garbage can or paper shredder. Do it now. When you put mail down, it should be in the trash can/shredder, in a return envelope, filed for tax time or in your scheduler to be paid on the appropriate day. If you bank online, you reduce the amount of mail you get and have to throw away.

Dishes:

Empty the dishwasher in the morning. Fill it during the day. Run it when you go to bed. No shortage of hot water, it helps heat the house (if you use the heated dry cycle) and is ready in the morning with clean dishes. Good for the psyche: Wake up to no mess.

Laundry:

When you take it off, put it away. Hang up your coat when you come in the house. In stocking feet? Put shoes away. Time for bath? Put dirty clothes in the laundry basket. If it is clean, put it in the closet or dresser.

There is more, so read on....

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